I was wearing green ... but I still got pinched
It was nicer than I expected
Gentle
Soft
He knew he was my first
My only request was
"Please, don't tell me you love me
I don't want to get the two things twisted"
I thought I would feel different
What I truly felt was relieved
I was 20 years old for Christ sake
What took so long ?
I have no idea
I was as surprised as the next guy that someone with tits as big as mine
hadn't already bagged half the town
I think big tits are more intimidating than pop culture would lead us to believe
I knew it was love when he played me Towns Van Zant on his guitar
while I sat naked on the couch I purchased for our new home together
We had it all
A leaky roof , shag rugs and cat
It was ours
He liked to play World of Warcraft on the computer
I liked to read on the couch and listen at him scream at his imaginary foes
I liked his beard
I liked the way he didn't talk much
But always meant what he said
I didn't know it was over when he didn't come home after I called
crying that our schizophrenic roommate tried to stab me through our bedroom wall
I didn't know it was over when I came in to see him and my best friend
on the couch I had purchased for our new home together
We had a song
We had a bedtime routine
We had a life
I only knew it was over when he said:
"I will marry you if that's what you really want , but I'd rather not"
I left the couch , the rug and the cat
I graduated 6 months later with a Women's Studies degree I felt I faked my way through
It feels strange to say that I do think of him fondly
Especially on St. Patrick's Day
